Crisis of Faith

Have you ever had a crisis of faith?

My definition of a crisis of faith is when God gives you an assignment or calls you to a task and you're not confident you can do it.

I'm having one now.

About six months ago, two of my children began having real problems in public school. Then, Katya, my 8th grader, flat out told me she wasn't going to high school because she didn't want to be tempted by drugs, sex or alcohol. She asked me to homeschool her.

     What do you say to that? "Sorry honey, I can't. Sucks for you!"

We happened to be sitting together in Barnes & Noble at the time. When I explained that I couldn't possibly homeschool her because she was smarter than me, she walked away. She came back five minutes later and slapped this book in my lap:

I laughed, but she was serious.

I prayed about it - hard. It's one of those things I said I'd never be able to do because I didn't have the desire or the patience. God confirmed that this is the path I need to take.

         Just a note - Don't ever tell God what you'll never do.

A lot happened in that six months and we've had many challenges since then. We've learned that my two other children, Dania and Sam, the ones who were having problems, have a form of Auditory Processing Disorder. I'm still learning about it and trying to wrap my head around what it means for us. Basically it has to do with the way sound travels through the ear and how it affects comprehension. It makes it difficult for my kids to learn in noisy environments.

We never had problems before because the kids were educated in a Montessori school with a smaller and quiet classroom environment. But now that the classes are getting bigger and the work is harder...

Anyway, that's what's causing my crisis of faith. The time is here and I've only got a couple of months to prepare for this new adventure in our lives. I haven't a clue about where this will take us or how it will affect their futures, but I have faith that God will equip and lead me to teach them in the best way.

I'm like the blind men that came to Jesus:

      As Jesus went on from there, two blind men followed him, calling out, "Have mercy on us, Son of David!"


     When he had gone indoors, the blind men came to him, and he asked them, "Do you believe that I am able to do this?"


     "Yes Lord," they replied.


      Then he touched their eyes and said, "According to your faith will it be done to you"; and their sight was restored." Jesus warned them sternly, "See that no one knows about this." But they went out and spread the news about him all over that region."  Matthew 9:27-31

Jesus never turned down the requests of those who came to him and he still doesn't.

Dear Jesus, thank you in advance for equipping us to do what you ask us to do. May you always get the credit for your power! Amen.

The Big O!

When you were little, did you ever disobey one of your parents?

I remember well the first time I disobeyed my mom. I was about six-years old and we were shopping in a five-and-dime store....now I've dated myself since very few five-and-dimes exist anymore.

I'd asked her to buy me some bubbles, but she said no. I wanted them desperately, because I loved the little wand. I was so mad she wouldn't let me have them, that I swiped them and hid them in my pocket when she wasn't looking.

When we got back to the car, they rolled out of my pocket and onto the floorboard. My brother saw them and waved them in the air. I tried to keep him quiet (I vividly remember that) but he made a huge fuss, asking why I was the only one who got bubbles. My mom was furious about my thievery and I was upset...but only because I got caught.

She grabbed me by the arm, dragged me and the bubbles back into the store and reported me to the manager. I remember being mortified and terrified as I made my apology.

I learned a great lesson about shoplifting that day.

Becoming and remaining Unstuck in our lives depends on the principle of observing Christ's commands. Look at what Jesus says about it in Matthew 28:18-20 (NIV):

Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

Now look at how the same passage is rendered in the KJV:

All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth. Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen."


If I really loved my mother that day in the five-and-dime, I would have listened to her and respected her decision to deny my lust for the bubbles. But I didn't, and I paid the price. Now, I don't know if she had a good reason to deny me or not, but I obviously knew she was in authority over me or I wouldn't have snuck them.

I delved deeper and went into the Greek Lexicon and found the word observe means to keep, guard, hold to.

Think of that!

God has entrusted us, his children with the responsibility of guarding his very words and instructions. You can be sure I'll be digging into the commands of Christ as I go through this new year and will record them for you.

I'm praying that this will be an amazing year of becoming more like Christ every day!