Saturday: Slowly by Slowly

By Erika Rizkallah

For several years my church has been helping the people of Lagutu, Uganda rebuild and restore their village which was ravaged by the LRA (Lord's Resistance Army).  In this incredible human tragedy, thousands of parents were slaughtered. Their captured children were forced to fight as soldiers by the rebel invaders.

Progress and healing is slow but the Ugandans have a popular saying:

                                  Slowly by slowly...

Slowly by slowly - in its own time or in God's timing - things will get done.

Living with Small Fiber Neuropathy , chronic pain and Fibromyalgia has forced me to change my pace. And the way I think . . .  about everything.

I've decided that this year, I will adopt the Slowly by Slowly motto for myself. Instead of despairing or being perpetually frustrated, I will embrace my limitations. I will consider it a gift from God that keeps me grounded and present in each moment.

And I will take pictures of my progress along the way because my illness robs me of memory. Slowly by slowly, my children will grow and mature and things that matter to me will get done. These small accomplishments will remind me that, oh yeah . . . I did do that!

So here are my first small Saturday: SbS pics for this day on January 17th -

Tidying up my little porch area

Bringing life (hopefully) to some weather beaten pansies

Your Turn: Do you have your own Slowly by Slowly accomplishments to tackle?

Blessings In Disguise

By Erika Rizkallah

I have a love-hate attitude about my chronic pain, a condition called Small Polyfiber Neuropathy. Of course I hate pain. But if I didn't have it, I wouldn't have been given a gift. One of those blessings in disguise things, if you know what I mean. 

Living an Unstuck life is all about freedom and movement. As we walk along the path of life God set out for us, we have freedom and rest for our souls. We also have movement... 

            We're walking with Him.

We're not stuck. 

However, we can be lured into that trapped/stuck lifestyle at any time. We have an adversary (Satan) who spends 100% of his time trying to kill, steal and destroy our life and everything meaningful to us.

Let's face it, we don't spend 100% of our time on anything; this gives him an advantage over us if we're not walking in the spirit.

We can be following God's plan when out of nowhere, we're hit with the rotten parts of life: confusion, crisis, strife in the home or an illness. These things come with decisions: Are we going to continue moving or are we going to let it paralyze us?

That's what happened to me when illness first struck. I didn't know what my body was doing or why - and neither did the doctors. Everything came to a screeching halt (me = screeching). But after a while, I resolved to get back on my feet and serve Him in my weakness. 

I also wanted to press on with my goals and enjoy the full life Jesus meant for me to have. 

I love to sing. I've been singing since I was four and was in choirs until high school. Then I got kicked out (long story) and stopped singing in groups. For the past three years I've been telling God I'd sing in his choir in Heaven, but several weeks ago I thought NO...I'm going to sing now! 

So I prayed for a choir I could sing with, and then...voila! I got the opportunity and joined it. Best of all, I get to sing with my daughter, Katya. 

Our choir is a mixed group of teens and adults and we traveled together to Tennessee to see three regional Broadway plays and perform a concert for a large church.

                                                       Two of our fave actors: Anna & Austin

I can't explain how joyful I felt watching people praise God from our position behind the pulpit. I now know what it means to offer myself as a living sacrifice and it was worth every ounce of pain I feel now.

                                                          Enjoying life with my daughter 
                                                                                               (I take terrible selfies)

What about you? Have you recognized any blessings in disguise from your illness?

Has your doctor put you in limbo? Being a patient takes patience

By Erika Rizkallah

Last week I followed up with my neurologist to get the final results from a three-part testing process I went through.

He called me into his office to let me know that my diagnosis is Small Polyfiber Neuropathy, which boils down to this: it hurts to have skin.

Technically it's a nerve disease in the small fibers of the body and there is no cure. Most people have it in the feet and legs but I have it all over. Most people are diabetic or overweight and can improve the pain through lifestyle change, but I'm neither diabetic nor overweight.

My case is considered idiopathic which boils down to this: They are clueless.

So my doctor put me in limbo for six months in the hope that The Mayo Clinic, The Cleveland Clinic or George Washington University would discover the cause. Obviously someone's been doing their research. The bad news for patients like me is that it takes about 10 years of research and clinical trials before any medicine can be prescribed.

So I'm in limbo. My doctor said, "Do you understand what I mean by limbo?" And I said, "yes."
Later I wondered why on earth do I understand limbo? Because it's not an actual place, it's a state of indecision. So I looked it up and it's also a theology, movie, dance and game that people play at parties.

But only young girls are successful, because older people break their backs playing this silly game. My clumsy family has never made it under the limbo stick, no matter how many times we try.

Why am I putting the name of my disease out there? It's been discovered that women with my condition and those that suffer from "pins and needles" or "ants running up arms and legs" often get diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

At any rate, the sensations ARE NOT NORMAL, so if you suffer from them, get to the doctor and see if they can find an underlying cause before more damage is done.

And take heart. Technological advances are making medications safer so that we can have a better quality of life.
                                                           Being a patient takes patience.

The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.

                                                                                                  Ecclesiastes 7:8