Has your doctor put you in limbo? Being a patient takes patience

By Erika Rizkallah

Last week I followed up with my neurologist to get the final results from a three-part testing process I went through.

He called me into his office to let me know that my diagnosis is Small Polyfiber Neuropathy, which boils down to this: it hurts to have skin.

Technically it's a nerve disease in the small fibers of the body and there is no cure. Most people have it in the feet and legs but I have it all over. Most people are diabetic or overweight and can improve the pain through lifestyle change, but I'm neither diabetic nor overweight.

My case is considered idiopathic which boils down to this: They are clueless.

So my doctor put me in limbo for six months in the hope that The Mayo Clinic, The Cleveland Clinic or George Washington University would discover the cause. Obviously someone's been doing their research. The bad news for patients like me is that it takes about 10 years of research and clinical trials before any medicine can be prescribed.

So I'm in limbo. My doctor said, "Do you understand what I mean by limbo?" And I said, "yes."
Later I wondered why on earth do I understand limbo? Because it's not an actual place, it's a state of indecision. So I looked it up and it's also a theology, movie, dance and game that people play at parties.

But only young girls are successful, because older people break their backs playing this silly game. My clumsy family has never made it under the limbo stick, no matter how many times we try.

Why am I putting the name of my disease out there? It's been discovered that women with my condition and those that suffer from "pins and needles" or "ants running up arms and legs" often get diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

At any rate, the sensations ARE NOT NORMAL, so if you suffer from them, get to the doctor and see if they can find an underlying cause before more damage is done.

And take heart. Technological advances are making medications safer so that we can have a better quality of life.
                                                           Being a patient takes patience.

The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.

                                                                                                  Ecclesiastes 7:8
                         

Affliction

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12

Joyful in hope...yes!

   Patient in affliction...ugh!

      Faithful in prayer...ok.

I find it hard to be patient in affliction, especially when everyone in my family is afflicted. Yes, officially every one of us. We all have a condition that needs to be managed and guess who's the manager?

As we draw more blood and send off more biohazardous samples to yet another lab, I lean on God's word and cry. Yes, cry! Jesus wept and I weep a lot because I'm so dang tired of caregiving when I'm sick myself.

You know what else we found out when we were at the doctor's office? It's good to cry. Really, really good. In fact, she prescribed it, because if we don't, our cortisol (stress hormone) levels rise and do terrible things to our bodies. So whenever I feel stressed out by all these trips to the doctor, I cry.

I also have joyful hope because God sent us to the right physician for help. Two weeks ago, my 17-year old daughter, Dania, was diagnosed with Lyme Disease. Her blood count's at a chronic level which means she's probably had it for several years. It is a missing piece of the depression puzzle so for that I'm eternally grateful.

I'd greatly appreciate your prayers...
           especially for patience and perseverance during these trials.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

Affliction

Af.flic.tion: Something that causes pain or suffering.

I feel like I may have worried some of my friends with my last Pity-Party post, so I'm going to use this post to explain more fully:)

I guess my family and I are under a period of "affliction." 

For well over a year now, each of us has been having random accidents, illness, physical injury, irritants, mental problems. Even my dog's been affected. Normally, I'm a "suck it up" person. I just suck it up and deal with whatever it is. But after this long you start to think REALLY?

              Is this ever going to end?

Are we ever going to sleep again? Because I don't even remember what that feels like.

Then the devil gets in and starts saying things like, "Nope. It's never, ever, going to end. EVER. This is how the rest of your life will stay." "You'll be in pain forever."

I know my God is bigger, but I admit that I 'd started to believe those voices in my head.

There is an upside to this though. Many upsides in fact, but the main one is growth. So that I don't remain in the pit part of the pity, I'm going to fight back in the way I know best.

With patience and praise.

I thank you God that you are trustworthy and true. I praise your holiness and your purpose in all things.

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12

Slow It Down Cowgirl!

As I awoke from a short, but deep sleep this morning, I agreed with God that I'd slow life down a bit and said, "Ok, the next post will be called Slow It Down Cowgirl!" So there you go and here it is...even if you're not a cowgirl.

Several years ago I actually had a blog called Live Slow. I wrote it as a reminder to myself every day, that while life may seem like it's flying by, I don't need to match the pace. You see, when I try to go faster than a speed that's comfortable for me, I end up missing out on quality time with Him.

Quality is the operative word.

I have a quiet time every single morning, but most times the quality comes when I'm going about my daily activities as a wife and mother. In fact, many of my most poignant interactions with God happen as I wash clothes, weed the flower garden, or make the beds.

God reveals himself to me in the mundane chores of life.

I almost never hear Him when I'm in a rush. I never hear him when I'm yelling at my kids to find their freakin' shoes so we're not tardy (again). I never hear Him when I'm trying to cram four errands into an hour.

He most often reveals Himself to me in the quiet things of life and that happens best when I live slow on purpose. Being slow takes practice and patience - lots and lots of it - but some of the most significant times of growth have come when I committed myself to this discipline.

If you're interested in giving it a shot, John Ortberg has an entire section on slowing down in his book, The Life You've Always Wanted, spiritual disciplines for ordinary people. It's a great read.

Wishing you a super slow weekend!