The Good Father - Part 2: Secrets and Lies in family history

So I found him. I found the "bad man."

It's kind of simple to label someone "bad," and then erase him from memory and the family history. But then I guess they didn't count on a curious granddaughter.

               I have an unquenchable curiosity.

And I also believe that people are complex and there's probably more to the story. When someone's legacy leaves such a stain, such a smudge, such a secret, it's hard not to be curious.  And it's hard not to wonder ...
                   
                          Am I anything like him?

I know he left and eventually started a new family. Because one of my family members stumbled upon them and secretly made contact with his son, I have a picture. I have one little picture, and when I look at it, I see my brother's face. I can also see where I got my chin. That's my chin! It's eerie and awesome at the same time.

For most of my life I thought he was dead. Correction. They told me he was dead. Turns out he died the year after I was married.

                   I could have met him.

                          Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs.
                                                                                                           Proverbs 10:12

Family History Tip: Family conflict is inevitable, but it's important to remember there are two sides to every story. If you've heard negative things about a family member, do your best to talk to them personally or ask several people for validation. Everyone deserves a chance to defend themselves.

Faith Detective

One of the things I most love about digging through my family's history, is finding common characteristics and interests that link us together now. Just some of the many things I've found are writing, singing, art, archiving and historical preservation.

                                                                     
Growing up as a young child, I felt like there was something off about me. Like there was a piece of myself that was missing and it was my destiny to find whatever "it" was. Now I know, that what I was searching for was God, the knowledge of who I am, and a sense of authentic intimacy in my family relationships.
                     
                               Thankfully, God found me, but I never lost the love of the search.

There were several breaks in my family's faith over the generations, but through ancestral research, I've been able to pick up pieces of the chain that once held us together.

Family History Tip:

Before you hop online and waste money, gather as much information as you can.  Making a list of full names, dates of births and deaths, hometown information and country of origin are most helpful.

                                                                                           Happy Hunting!