Blessings In Disguise

By Erika Rizkallah

I have a love-hate attitude about my chronic pain, a condition called Small Polyfiber Neuropathy. Of course I hate pain. But if I didn't have it, I wouldn't have been given a gift. One of those blessings in disguise things, if you know what I mean. 

Living an Unstuck life is all about freedom and movement. As we walk along the path of life God set out for us, we have freedom and rest for our souls. We also have movement... 

            We're walking with Him.

We're not stuck. 

However, we can be lured into that trapped/stuck lifestyle at any time. We have an adversary (Satan) who spends 100% of his time trying to kill, steal and destroy our life and everything meaningful to us.

Let's face it, we don't spend 100% of our time on anything; this gives him an advantage over us if we're not walking in the spirit.

We can be following God's plan when out of nowhere, we're hit with the rotten parts of life: confusion, crisis, strife in the home or an illness. These things come with decisions: Are we going to continue moving or are we going to let it paralyze us?

That's what happened to me when illness first struck. I didn't know what my body was doing or why - and neither did the doctors. Everything came to a screeching halt (me = screeching). But after a while, I resolved to get back on my feet and serve Him in my weakness. 

I also wanted to press on with my goals and enjoy the full life Jesus meant for me to have. 

I love to sing. I've been singing since I was four and was in choirs until high school. Then I got kicked out (long story) and stopped singing in groups. For the past three years I've been telling God I'd sing in his choir in Heaven, but several weeks ago I thought NO...I'm going to sing now! 

So I prayed for a choir I could sing with, and then...voila! I got the opportunity and joined it. Best of all, I get to sing with my daughter, Katya. 

Our choir is a mixed group of teens and adults and we traveled together to Tennessee to see three regional Broadway plays and perform a concert for a large church.

                                                       Two of our fave actors: Anna & Austin

I can't explain how joyful I felt watching people praise God from our position behind the pulpit. I now know what it means to offer myself as a living sacrifice and it was worth every ounce of pain I feel now.

                                                          Enjoying life with my daughter 
                                                                                               (I take terrible selfies)

What about you? Have you recognized any blessings in disguise from your illness?

Follow Me

One of the things I struggle with is comparing myself to others. I don't know where it even comes from, but sometimes I find myself thinking...I wonder what she's doing? or Why is he doing that? Should I be doing that?

There's a story in the Bible that God's been reminds me of this. It's the story of Jesus restoring Peter after he denied knowing him. Here's a brief synopsis of the account in John 21:

Jesus had already been crucified but was appearing to various disciples. One day, Peter decides to go night fishing and some other disciples went with him. They didn't catch anything, but early in the morning they see a guy standing on the shore. He says, "Friends, haven't you any fish?" They tell him they don't, and he tells them to throw the net on the right side of the boat. When they did, there were so many fish in the net that they couldn't even haul them in.

At that point, John says, "It is the Lord!" John recognized the provision and who it came from. Peter jumps into the water and swims to shore. Imagine how desperate he must have been! Jesus was cooking them a breakfast of fish and bread and they ate with him. This was the third time he'd appeared to his disciples after being raised from the dead.

Then he begins to restore Peter. He asks him three separate times, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?" Peter says yes all three times. Peter's restored and Jesus then tells him how he will die (by crucifixion).

       Then he says, "Follow me!"

When I picture that restoration scene playing out on the beach, I see Peter and Jesus walking by themselves. It must have been heart wrenching for Peter, after all that's happened to answer those questions. Then...

"Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them.  ...When Peter saw him, he asked, "Lord, what about him?" Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me." 

Basically Jesus said, "It's none of your business. It's mine, and you belong to me."

That's the passage of scripture that forms in my head every time I start to wonder what other people are doing. I hear Him saying, "It's none of your business. You focus on me and me only."

It's hard to do, especially when I see him using my friends in amazing ways.

    Do you struggle with this too?

Here's a great thought from Oswald Chamber's devotional, My Utmost For His Highest: "Never try to make your experience a principle for others, but allow God to be as creative and original with others as He is with you."

I hope that helps you like it helps me. We're not meant to be like others, He has his own unique and creative plan for each one of us.

         Follow Him!

Changing Bad Habits

I've chosen the top 3 bad habits to focus on right now based on how attacking one bad habit can often fix other issues with minimal effort. My top 3 are:

1. Lack of exercise - When I exercise, I get more energy for the day, I last longer and am much less cranky. I also pay better attention to what I eat. Frankly, the main reason I become unproductive is because I'm exhausted and I run out of energy.

2. Procrastination - It's easy to make excuses when you're exhausted, but procrastination is only prolonging the inevitable for me. If there's a menial task to be done, more than likely it's my responsibility so I'm only hurting myself by piling up loads of boring things if I don't just get over with quickly.

3. Not giving myself the luxury of time - God is the author of my life, and the author of my time, so I don't know why I feel like I have to learn everything immediately. Maybe it's related to the piles undone things that taunt me, like my piles of photos saying, "Really? You can't even send these pictures to your poor sick grandmother?" Which is probably because my son can never find his socks and shoes and my husband always wants to wear the shirt I haven't gotten around to washing.

An interesting thing I learned simply by being mindful over the last few days, is that these bad habits are caused by underlying issues. God really hit me over the head with the fact that I have an underlying fear of wasting time. Both my brother and I have this unexplained concern. We both believed we wouldn't live past 30. We have no idea where these thought patterns come from, but had I not taken the time to identify my bad habits, I wouldn't have realized the effect it's having on me.

Every time I tried to get something done, a little voice in my head would say something like, "You don't have time for that." or "That's a waste of time." I realize I've been letting that voice influence the choices I make throughout the day.

That's how the enemy works. He puts a phrase, negative comment, or totally irrational thought into your head and tries to get you to own it. Only when I slowed, and quieted down to listen, did I realize the effect it's been having on me.

I have placed a "Non-Negotiable" boundary around myself regarding giving these items attention.  Honestly, trying it already for only a day, has made me more focused than I have been in months. Here's my commitment to myself -

Exercise:  Cardio for one hour 4 days a week and strength training with my trainer 2 days a week.

Procrastination:  It doesn't exist in my world anymore. Nothing gets delayed. My husband has this philosophy and I used to just think he was a super freak, but his success has proven me wrong time and time again.

Time: No fear. I will plan my day accordingly and build in the hours I need in order to learn and do the things I need to learn and do and I will stop listening to "the voice."

I'm pumped! I worked out with my trainer for an hour yesterday, thinking I was going to die of a heart attack the whole time, but I pushed through...to the point of nausea. I almost puked and thought about taking a picture to show you what I looked like but then you may never come back to read. Instead, I'll leave you with a picture of my pretty pink gloves!

While I was punching and kicking my way to pukeville, I kept saying, "This is for you Jesus!" I sincerely, felt His pleasure.

Oliver Wendall Holmes said, "We all need an education in the obvious." The Bible tells us to examine ourselves closely. I urge you to take a look at your own bad habits and create a plan of attack!

Unstuck

It's important for you to know what Unstuck is so you get what this blog is really about. Unstuck is about movement. It's about identifying those stuck patterns and areas of your life that aren't good for you or glorifying to God. Those could be areas of sin, unhealthy habits, bondage, oppression and attitudes.

I know what it feels like to be stuck in a cycle. I suffered for years with extreme discontent. It was a deep, eating at my soul feeling that something wasn't right. Year after year I would journal and struggle and journal and struggle and still nothing would change. Thankfully I learned to journal faithfully because one year I decided to go back and read them. I was stunned. I was writing and thinking the same things over and over and before I knew it, five years had passed. I was stuck and sick about it.

The scary part was that I didn't know how to fix it, but the fear of having another year pass, overrode the fear of making necessary changes. I couldn't and didn't do it on my own. I did it with Jesus. He set me free and He can set you free too.

So that's what it's all about - movement toward the life God has in mind for you.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.  John 10:10